


Shouldn't Be

by AllisonDiamond



Category: Iron Fist (TV), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Defenders (Marvel TV)
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Caring Danny Rand, Comfort/Angst, Danny Rand Needs a Hug, Feels, Hurting Ward Meachum, M/M, Ward Meachum Needs a Hug
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-24
Updated: 2017-03-24
Packaged: 2018-10-10 05:06:41
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,171
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10429794
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AllisonDiamond/pseuds/AllisonDiamond
Summary: This thing between them is wrong, and if he were stronger, he'd let Danny go.





	

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: This is really angsty as hell. So, don't read, if this isn't your thing.

“This is wrong,” he says, lips warm across Danny’s cheeks. “We can’t keep on doing this.”

“No, it isn’t,” Danny says softly and smiles, as if anything good _can_ come between this fucked up thing between them. “There’s _nothing_ wrong with this. With you. I chose to be with you.” He presses his palm gently over Ward’s chest. “Because, this,” he begins and moves his palm down to Ward’s heart, “heart _is_ also mine.”

“Danny,” he tries, voice broken and raspy, trying his damn hardest not to sound like a broken dam. “You _don’t_ understand. I’ve done things. Both in the past and in, fuck, even now.”

“I know—”

“You know shit!”

He blinks away the unshed tears. He curls his hand into a fist and shakes violently. Danny pulls him in against his chest, and Ward wants to resists, but he is so fucking weak. 

And, oh god, he hates that about himself, how fucking weak he is. If he were stronger, he could have protected _Joy_ from falling victim to Harold’s influence. If he were stronger, he’d never hurt Danny when he was younger. If he were stronger, he’d never used Danny as a quick fix, a warm body, a quick fuck whenever he needs something to take away the pain. If he were stronger, he’d never have fallen in love with Danny fucking Rand.

But, he wants, he fucking wants Danny to shove him against the wall, wants him to fuck him raw until he passes out from the pain. He wants to hurt, hurt, and hurt, but Danny would never do that. Danny is a gentle lover. He makes him feel like he is worth something, makes him feel loved and cared for, and he doesn't need that. 

Danny makes him feel as if he is actually _worth_  something.

He wants to laugh so badly right now, but he doesn’t have it in him. He has went and done the one thing he promises himself never to do: fall in love. 

“You know shit, Danny,” he continues, keeping his thoughts at bay, because if he doesn’t, he will break down, and Danny will be there to pick up the broken pieces, and he doesn’t deserve that. “I _fucking_ lost it! I killed dear old dad. Yes, Danny, I wasn’t _there_ to play nice to dear old dad. I was there to _clean_ up my mess. And I’d kill him _again_ , anything to wipe that damn smile off his face, if I have to.”

“Ward, I know, and I understand.” He strokes a thumb lovingly across Ward’s tear-struck face. “I _want_ to be here for you. To help you through this mess. To make you whole again. You’ve done the same for me, so let me in, Ward.”

“Danny, how can you be so stupid!” He looks right into Danny’s crystal clear blue eyes, and they look so inviting that Ward just wants to get lost into them forever. “I’m not fucking good for you! And for anyone else!”

“You _are_ good for me. I know you’ve issues, but so have I. You’re not the only one who _is_ tainted. I’m bad. My soul isblack, rotten, and dead — it’s basically garbage.” Danny smiles and Ward wants to beat that smile out of his gorgeous, pink, lustful lips. “If you let me help you, we can overcome anything together.”

“I don’t know what they teach you in that monastery, but you’re not _fucking_ tainted! You’re the purest man I’ve ever met!” He leans in until their foreheads brush against one and another. “And I’m fucking wrong for you. You should be with someone that’s fucking right for you, and that isn’t me. Shit, Danny!”

Danny laughs. “I know we _aren’t_ the ideal match for each other, but what we have between us, it’s good and real. I _don’t_ want to lose that. Lose you. I _love_ you. Every day, I’m out there, bleeding, I think of you, and it gives me the courage to go on, to live a while longer. You’re the reason I’m not another dead body on the streets.”

“Danny—”

“No, Ward.” He presses a thumb across Ward’s lips. “I get it. I’m not denying that we don’t have issues. We’ve a lot of those, and I know we _might_ never be able to work through each and every one of them. But for the ones we can work through … I want to be able to work through those issues with you by my side.”

“Danny, you’re fucking stupid, if you think that is going to work. This isn’t a fairytale; this is real life.” He wants to yell, but he settles for whispering. He loves this man so much, and it breaks his heart every fucking time Danny _tries_ to brush over the problems between them, like they can be fixed with just a few words here and there. It ain’t right. It’s full of shit, that’s what it is. “That won’t work!”

“You might be right, but I want to give this a chance. And if I’m wrong, I’ll willing to take the blame.”

“Danny—”

“No, Ward, I know that you _are_ so much more than this shitty person you’re trying to be. And I love that man. I love how he melts when I kiss him. I love how he looks at me when he thinks I’m not looking. I love how he bites his lip when I make love to him. I love absolutely everything about him. But Ialso want to break through _this_ conflicted mask you’re wearing right now.”

“Danny—”

“Please, let me in. I want to be here for you,” Danny pleads, eyes glossy and pained. “Don’t pull away from me now. I want you. I love you. I need you. But if you decide to end this thing between us, I understand. I … I … I’ll let you go. I’ll back off. But if you think I’ll ever leave you alone when you need me, you’re dead wrong. I’ll never ever stop _caring_ for you, being there for you, loving you.”

“Danny, why?” he whispers and he sounds like a fucking broken dam. “How can you love me? I’m a shitty person.”

“Because underneath all that,”he says and stares into Ward’s eyes, “whatever you want to call it, is a kind, vulnerable man whom I love more than anything in the world. I want to protect him, to hold him, to kiss him, to love him, as long as he’d have me.”

“Danny—”

“You don’t have to say anything.”

Ward looks at him, like a lost child, and he presses his lips against Danny’s warm, smiling ones. Fuck it all! He knows he _isn’t_ thinking straight right now, and if he hasn't been so fucking weak, he’d let Danny go. It’d be the right thing. But right now, he has the man he loves by his side, and if he can keep him there for a while longer, he’d take that fucking chance.

God damn it all!

 

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Come say hi on [tumblr](http://neenabthurman.tumblr.com)


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